Sunday, May 31, 2009

Thoughts on sailing, drifting, and not drowning (and a bit about the titanic)

I'm not the sailing type. In fact I've never been on a sail boat, unless you count playing on my friend's sail boat in the drive way when we were kids. I have driven a boat before, but that's not really where I'm heading with this.
A few weeks ago I found myself in a conversation with four other single people laughing over the "misery" of our single status. In reality I don't think misery is the right word, but it sounds good, and a little bit dramatic, so I'll keep it. It was observed that many people who we saw as less emotionally prepared for a relationship ended up married long before those whom we felt were deserving of a long term relationship. My friend made a very titanic analogy by explaining in the following terms...

Some people see themselves in floating around in an ocean with nothing to hang onto, so the first warm body they see in a similar situation they grab onto. Both of them cling for dear life. That's how people who we least expect to get married first, get married.

My thoughts... sad but true.

We've all watched the movie or at least know the plot... Jack dies.

So many relationships are born out of fear of being alone. We drift aimlessly into the arms of someone else aimlessly drifting near by. How is that expected to start a healthy relationship, if there is such an urgency to remedy our loneliness? One person won't fix that, let's be honest it's something deeper!

I may not be good at sailing, but I did spend last summer life guarding. Though I spent most of my certification process on heavy pain killers, I remember a vital life saving tactic. Most people who are panicking often make the mistake of grabbing on for dear life. As a life guard, you're best hope at saving the person from drowning and not personally drowning in the process is getting your floatation device securely in between you and the victim. If they grab on to you, get out - for your sake and their sake too. Two people hanging onto each other in hopes to float, will most likely sink, as will frantically trying to grab onto the closest person who looks like they can swim or save you.

Just some thoughts.


Patched Saint said...

I never looked at it that way! lol! Two people desperately hanging on to dear life!
i guess its being in love with the thought of being in love and mistakenly channeling the feeling to an individual.

TreadmillGirl said...

Well said, I enjoy your friend's analogy.