Thursday, September 18, 2008
Sometimes easy isn't easy
Today, I turned in my resignation in a job that I just started. To me it sounds thoughtless and irresponsible, and I suppose in a way it is. In this moment I feel awful and afraid. Awful because I have let people down, afraid because I might have made the wrong decision.
Scared because all of a sudden the bottom has dropped out beneath me. Suddenly I know exactly where my God is, and I have been too stubborn to turn around and look him in the eye.
In reality I try so hard to do things by myself, like a stubborn child who hasn't figured out how to tie her shoes. No mater how hard I try by myself to live my life I get it all knotted up or get no where at all.
Today I feel all knotted up in the midst of no where at all. And as much as it hurts, I'm ok because I have started to realize where my priorities are and where they should be.
With that said, it is time to simply sit on my hands, shut my mouth and listen.
Sometimes the easy way turns out more difficult. Sometimes opportunities that are placed in your path are simply distractions in pretty wrapping paper.
**Update: I ended up not leaving this job**